In His Time

“Well that wasn’t what I expected.” I remember thinking while sitting in the back yard of my Pastor’s house around 20 years old. I’d walked over to his house a few blocks from the Fredonia campus one fall afternoon for some advice and guidance. I was in love with a girl at school and I wanted his counsel on the right (godly) way to proceed. (I can’t type the word “love” without hearing Dean Bye say it, geez.) As we sat there and I poured out my heart on why she was the “one” he listened. After I was done he spoke and said words that I still remember to this day. “Do not pursue her. Don’t chase after her.” That was not what I expected to here, nor was it really what I wanted to hear. I wanted to hear go for it with reckless abandon, go all in. I sat there stunned. I was in college, wasn’t this the time to just go for it.

However, I respected him and trusted his judgement so I didn’t jump in with reckless abandon. What he was saying was focus on Christ, let God lead, and trust Him. Stuff that was hard to do at 20, quite honestly, when there was a great desire on my part to get on with life.

This memory came to mind today on the way home from Bender’s Christian Supply. I went there looking for a housewarming gift but came up empty. Well, not totally empty, bought two CD’s, the War Room DVD, and a few cards, but not what I originally went there for. While wandering Bender’s I noticed that they were set up for the next few months with lots of Mother’s day, Father’s day, and wedding season gifts. The wedding season gifts were everywhere! Of course they reminded me I’m still single.

Also, earlier this week while having a delicious dinner with friends, they somehow got me to talk about myself. Good job Billy and Emily, I’m still not sure how you did it. Anyway, in between snickerdoodle balls, can’t really call them cookies haha, our conversations ran the gamut between singleness, marriage, and trusting God and His timing. Billy and Emily are newlyweds so it was cool to hear their story. By the way, going to digress for a minute, Billy and Emily this haiku is for you guys. I wrote it last night.

A winter wedding
Two hearts joined eternally
Christ is the center

Looking back over that night, my prayers over the last few weeks, and tonight’s shopping experience I’ve realized there have been a few themes.

God keeps bringing to mind Ecclesiastes 3:11a 11 – “He has made everything beautiful in its time.” Or as it is said in the Amplified Bible “He has made everything beautiful and appropriate in its time.”

That’s been a good reminder to remember that even when I’m not sure what God has in store for me, that He’s in charge. One of my favorite verses says it this way.

“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

In matters of the heart, God knows my heart, and that is good enough for now. I don’t know why I didn’t get married young like my friends Brian and Danielle, or Bill and Heather, or more recent friends Mike and Nina or the aforementioned Billy and Emily. But God knows why.

The other verse that has been popping up, including as a giant wall decal in Billy and Emily’s apartment, is Esther 4:14 which is paraphrased as “Perhaps this is the moment for which you have been created.”

Last night I was praying in the prayer room at church and this verse wouldn’t leave me alone. I asked God why I was here at this time in this place. His answer was I was created for this time, and to be used for His purposes.

Circumstances do not dictate who I am Christ does, and I am clean thanks to the cross.

Therefore, as I continue into 2016 I look forward to God’s plan continuing to unfold. Looking back 20 years from now the journey will be clear but right now I just have to take a step.